Here’s the deal. I recently invested in an in-depth blog consultation with a noted blogologist. I started the session by crossing my legs in a serious manner and asking her, “What can I do to increase interest in my blog?”
She gave me a knowing nod, a buttered croissant, and muttered, “Have you written a series of posts confronting the minutia of daily life, while sprinkling in an occasional top ten list where you rank things that no sane person would consider ranking?”
“Yes,” I declared, nearly jumping out of my seat and spilling my butterscotch pudding, “That’s exactly what I’ve done.”
“But,” she continued, wryly hand washing a newly-shot bearskin rug, “Have you ever tried posting a Double Dip, No Explanation Top Ten List?”
I slowly set down my dog-eared, unauthorized Liza Minnelli autobiography and my eyes widened with child-like wonder, “A Double Dip, No Explanation Top Ten List? I don’t even know what that is…”
She went on to explain the details. Two top ten lists in one blog entry. No explanation as to the rankings. Just the list. Doubled. Obviously, I was knocked asunder with the possibilities. I’d never heard of such magical notions. Incredulous, I asked if she was pulling my leg…was this whole Double Dip thing even real? She insisted that it was. I probed further, asking if maybe she wasn’t even real, that perhaps I had concocted her and the entire conversation out of thin air. She was willing to admit that this was likely the case, but nonetheless recommended I try her strategy.
So here we go.
The Top Ten Containers
The Top Ten Units of Measurement
1. Baker’s Dozen
Clearly, I chose these lists to offer without explanation because…come on, is there really any explanation necessary? If anyone can come up with a better container than an envelope and/or a better unit of measurement than the baker’s dozen, I’d like to hear it. And if anyone has a compromising photograph of noted British aviatrix Amy Johnson, I’d like to see it. And if anyone could make sense of this unusually unusual blog entry in limerick form, I’d like to read it.
I’m never listening to a noted blogologist again.